About Me
Hi I’m Lois Silva!
I am so glad that you are here. Here’s a little bit about myself and my journey with God, and how I learned of God’s love.
Learning to let God love me has been the greatest lesson of my life.
One of my earliest memories is asking Jesus into my heart. My mother helped me say a prayer and I remember it all very clearly. We were sitting at the kitchen table in our home in Indiana. While I was very young, that moment has been written deep within my heart and stays as a core memory.
Growing up as a PK (pastor’s kid that is)
In my elementary school days, my father became an associate pastor, and later a pastor of a church in New Mexico. Those years I was gaining in a lot of God knowledge. It’s impossible not to when your life revolves around the church. My relationship with God was growing steadily.
Unfortunately, being a PK is not all roses and sunshine. In fact, it can be quite dark and thorny. Sometimes being a PK means that you walk around with a target on your entire person. And your “brothers and sisters” are just a little too wiling to shoot you with accusations, assumptions, and insults.
Hey there!
I’m Lois, an imperfect wife, mother, pet lover, and follower of Jesus. Here’s a little of my story and how I got to this place.
Struggle
Like many young adults, I struggled in my faith at the end of high school/college years.
Struggle
I never abandoned my faith, but I did pick up some limiting beliefs about God. Not to mention a host of rather unfortunate habits.
Comfort eating, impulse shopping, swearing, and more.
The worst part of picking up these habits was I didn’t even recognize how damaging they were to me at the time.
I thought, these are not a big deal. I slowly began to put on excess weight, go into debt, “curse like a sailor”, etc. Still I failed to recognize the toll these things were taking on my spiritual, mental and physical health.
My view of God was all wrong.
I thought that every wrong thing in my life was God punishing me. God was so punitive to me in those days. Without mercy, compassion or love, my view of God was ugly.
I was in a very dark place. While I still had faith in God, I was angry and ashamed. Like Adam and Eve, I hid from God rather than confess my sins and ask forgiveness. And worse, I felt alone. I couldn’t talk with other Christians in my church, I already was a target. They would use me to hurt my dad. Nope, that was definitely, NOT an option.
God’s mercy endures forever
In 2016, I gave birth to a still-born perfectly beautiful baby girl, Juliet. And this was the absolute worst moment of my life. I was drowning in grief, laying on my couch in absolute silence.
My husband and I decided that we needed to find a new church. A place where we could build authentic relationships with other Christians, where our children could find friends.
And God was faithful, he brought us to a new church. The pastor had one message every Sunday, but he presented it in so many different ways that it never felt like one message. Of course, God in His infinite wisdom brought me to this church. He wanted me to hear this message until I understood it. Until I KNEW it was true.
“Live in God’s Love. Make it your home. Make it the bed from which you rise every morning. Make it the table from which you eat. Make it the sofa on which you lounge. Make it the pool in which you swim. Make it your home, church. Live. In. God’s. Love.”
Ryan Bestelmeyer
You can’t live in God’s love, if you don’t know He loves you. If you don’t feel loved, it’s impossible. So we were taught about God’s love each and every Sunday. And I make God’s love my home.
God’s Love
How many times had I heard that statement. I don’t believe that anyone saying it had any intention of damaging my view of God. They were trying to express that we should obey God and confess our sins. That God does not want us to live in sin.
But, the message received was, God can not love me because He is holy and I am an unclean sinner.
Friend, if you have heard that phrase the same way I did, let me say it this way. Yes, God is Holy, BUT He is also Love.
Can God actually love me?
How could God possibly love me? The creator of the universe, filled with incredible amazing people, and me being … well, me?
He loves ME? Yes, and friend, He loves you too.
I spent so much time trying to learn that God loved me. Trying to believe that God loved me. And while I was working on understanding God’s love, he was busy at work healing my heart.
The light of God’s love is bright
Once I learned to let God love me, and to walk each day in light of His love. I found that the light and love could not stay inside me, it spilled out everywhere. A song we sing at church became my “anthem”, if you will.
“Make me an instrument of your peace, where there is hatred let me show love, where there is darkness let me shine light. May your love cause us to open up, cause us to open up our hearts. May your light cause us to shine so bright, that we bring hope into the dark.”
Live in God’s love
So friend, here we are. God’s love has entered my heart and I am so thankful that He loves me and has given me this beautiful light for my path. And I want to share it with others. That’s why I started this blog.
God’s light is too bright to keep under a bushel. God’s love is so overwhelming, it spills out of you.
I now volunteer in my church’s youth group, shining light and love into the most beautiful middle and high school kids. My family teaches 3rd-5th grade on Sundays, shining God’s light and love into those amazing children.
And if you can believe it, there is still so much light and love in my heart for Jesus, I just had to start this blog.
Perhaps you are like me filled with God’s light and love. Or maybe you don’t know Jesus. Maybe you have heard of Him, and you don’t have a very good impression. Or you walk with Jesus, but find yourself in a dark place.
I’m so glad you are here. You did not find this blog by accident. The Holy Spirit works in fantastic ways and He is always calling us to Himself. So he can fill us with His light and love. Because He knows that is exactly what we need.
I’d love to hear from you, and about you too!
Be sure to subscribe to my email list, and then drop me an email. Let me know about your story. You can also find me on these platforms.
STOP letting time manage you (part 2)
Do you let time manage you? I am finite, and time is finite, what do I actually, truly, deeply desire to do with time? Do I want to manage it?
Tired of time managing you? How to make it stop (part 1)
Life is busy. I’m sure you already know. But I’ve begun realizing that sometimes, life is busy because I let time manage me. What are some of the pitfalls of catering to time’s insistent ticking?
But … I just need to be better with my money …
How many times have I said “I just need to be better with my money”? And I truly believed that was true. But God had something to tell me about this blanket statement I made all the time. He doesn’t think I need to be better. He thinks I need to STOP being wicked.